Factmetillifart

Kepler was born into the lowest social class in Germany in 1571

A sickly child, being extremely nearsighted, and having skin problems

He nearly died of Smallpox when he was just four years old

But his mother was a dealer, so she gave him some potions she sold

 

He was a terrible teacher, not a single student wanted to take his class

Yet he continued teaching for a whole year with no one to fail or pass

Health problems made his calculations difficult, most done while standing up

Suffering from a severe case of haemorrhoids, dangleberries and clagnuts

 

He had an extreme fear of taking a bath his first wife finally forced him in it

8 years into their marriage; but he thought it unpleasant, lasted but a minute

 

Got kicked out of Austria for failing to convert to Roman Catholicism

But a chance to get a job in Prague with the king’s mathematician

His works were added to the church’s Index of forbidden books

Till someone dared say a Pope was wrong, in 1966. That sucks

 

And it has been said that he was the first to write a work of science fiction

First to describe real, virtual, upright and inverted images and magnification

First to discover and describe the properties of total internal reflection

And first to explain the use of both eyes for depth perception

 

First to explain the principles of how a telescope works and refraction in the eye

First to investigate pinhole cameras and those first pictures that never lie

First to measure the distance to the stars using stellar parallax of incoming light

First to suggest that the Sun rotates about its axis, and to coin the term“Satellite”

 

First to explain that the tides are caused by the Moon and not than hand of God

First to realize that the darkness of the night sky is completely at odds…

With the idea of an infinite Universe filled with all the stars detected

First to derive the birth year of Christ, which is now universally accepted

 

First to derive logarithms, based on nothing but pure maths

First to explain that all bodies come together with a force proportionate to their mass

First to correctly explain the first natural laws, which are universal, verifiable, and precise

First to correctly explain planetary motion, as founder of celestial mechanics, will that suffice?